there are challenges
My firewall has a hardware failure. My phone has a hardware failure. My oven has a hardware failure (the computer). My wife's phone has a hardware failure (the screen and battery).
This weird run of failures started intensely two weeks ago when a customer had a bad drive. It continues. At least my phone was genuinely my fault. It turns out that Epsom Salt Baths are especially troublesome for electronics. Of course, the sink full of dishwater which I subsequently dropped it in didn't help. I was openning a pack of my drying-rice, and God Help me, I dropped it. I think the dish soap actually created a worse problem than the saltwater bath.
I am working on some writing for professional purposes - resume and skills assessments. The content and quality need to be topnotch, but I get endless interruptions. The process is causing me to look at the last 20 years. I have actually done many things. Interestingly, when I look back, I think that I missed a few opportunities because I was too focused on the moment and worried about the wrong things.
there are benefits
Looking intently, I can see where I could have made many different choices and some of those could have had exciting possibilities. That, I find the most rewarding outcome, thus far, in the midst of this strange season. It's like I discovered that some of my compasses haven't always been pointing North. This lead to last week's decision to do a 30-day Worry Fast. No worrying about anything for 30 days. Of course, saying that creates more worry, but I am growing accustomed to putting it down.
In short, a little more confidence, professionally, and a lot less worry would have seen several opportunities tested. I suspect at least one would have succeeded.
Personally, I am succeeding at my aims, though it is hardly only me. The time scale is daunting, and twenty years ago, discouraging. This involves all the people in my life starting with Colette and spiraling outward from her.
As example; I physically posted these little excerpts of The Cardinal Virtues in my boys' bathroom at home. Seeing as how I have boys, and I need to keep them alive despite their best efforts to the contrary, I posted "Prudence" behind the toilet, just at eye level for a young-man. The three-pane mirror behind the sink holds "Temperance", "Justice" and "Fortitude" across the top.
I have to say, in less than two weeks I saw immediate, measurable effect. It was small, Shea observed that he would cause boxes to fall if he removed an apple, so he first moved the boxes, then got the apple and carefully reassembled the stack. When I complimented him on anticipating the consequences, he said "Yeah Dad, that's Prudence".
success leads to success
It's the little things in life that you cherish. Part of not worrying requires me to set down the troubling knots and kinks which continue to frustrate me. That leaves me free to appreciate the successes that I already have, and that, in terms of neuro-plasticity, is a self-rewarding upward spiral.
[sorry for grammar and typos].